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Nonbinary Identities: Three Common Misconceptions

Writer: Murron O'Neill, LCSW
Murron O'Neill, LCSW
Jan 30, 2025
2 min read

Updated: Feb 25, 2025



Nonbinary Identities: Three Common Misconceptions - Therapy for LGBTQ+

The question of gender identity is currently a contentious issue on American soil. On the day of his Inauguration, President Donald J. Trump signed the executive order “Defending Women From Gender Ideology Extremism and Restoring Biological Truth to the Federal Government.” There are many transphobic opinions stated in this executive order that go against direct facts outlined by the medical and psychiatric communities, one of which is as follows:


“It is the policy of the United States to recognize two sexes, male and female. These sexes are not changeable and are grounded in fundamental and incontrovertible reality.”


The American Psychological Association, the American Medical Association, the National Association of Social Workers, and the American Mental Health Counselors Association firmly believe in the existence of diverse gender identities and the existence of nonbinary people. With the government formally taking a stance against the recommendation of medical and mental health specialists, we would like to take the opportunity to clear up a few misconceptions about what “nonbinary” actually means.


Nonbinary is not a “third gender”, and nonbinary people are not a perfect 50:50 split of masculine and feminine.


The Human Rights Campaign (HRC) defines nonbinary identities as the following:


“An adjective describing a person who does not identify exclusively as a man or a woman. Nonbinary people may identify as being both a man and a woman, somewhere in between, or as falling completely outside these categories. While many also identify as transgender, not all nonbinary people do. Nonbinary can also be used as an umbrella term encompassing identities such as agender, bigender, genderqueer or gender-fluid.”


Some nonbinary people question their validity as a person who is nonbinary if they tend to lean as presenting more masculine or feminine. Thankfully, androgyny is not a paradigm of what nonbinary means. You could be the most hyper-feminine or hyper-masculine person in existence and still be perfectly valid your nonbinary identity. 


Nonbinary identities are not some “new woke thing”.


Cultures all around the world recognize the existence of more than two genders, from two-spirit people in Native American cultures to hijras in Hindu society. The singular “they” pronoun has been used in the English language for centuries.


But frankly, even if it was hypothetically some new woke thing, why does that matter? It’s a testament to how far society has advanced that people have the opportunity to learn about and grow into their own identity.


Nonbinary people are real.


Whether or not they are formally recognized, nonbinary people exist. You may not understand it, but that is perfectly fine! The good news is, you don’t have to perfectly understand a topic in order to validate and respect it. Truthfully, it doesn’t really affect you. It’s easy to support the nonbinary people in your community. Simply ask after pronouns, try your best, and do better when you mess up (we all do!).


Therapists here at Compassionate Healing are knowledgeable, supporting, and validating. Please reach out to us if we can be of any support. 


14 Comments


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Jennifer. Luice
a day ago

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3 days ago

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